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-What new f*ckery is this? Justin Bieber just broke his silence following his arrest to compare himself to Michael Jackson.
-Meanwhile, in court Bieber said he got the Xanax he was on at the time of his arrest from his mom. And his dad celebrated his release from jail by drinking with him, so the kid is clearly in good hands.
-Was Connie Britton the difficult employer Scandal’s Katie Lowes keeps talking about? Whelp!
–Ellen Pompeo and Patrick Dempsey just shrugged and accepted dump trunks full of money to stick it out on Grey’s Anatomy for a couple more years.
-Another day, another sighting of Jon Hamm free-balling.
-On last night’s Fallon, Jonah Hill talked about that time Joe Pesci stuck his finger up his butt. So…yeah.
–Gabourey Sidibe says the AHS cast got into a bar brawl in defense of costar Sarah Paulson.
–Cate Blanchett says she was “a couple of sheets to the wind” by the time her Golden Globes category was called and doesn’t rememeber her speech.
-Yikes! Mary J. Blige‘s fatheris in critical condition after being stabbed in the neck by an ex-girlfriend.
–Adam Scott and Paul Rudd have recreated the Bosom Buddies theme song, and it’s magnificent.
-Now that Parks & Rec has finally figured out what to do with Rob Lowe (his and Rashida Jones’ storyline last night was their best in ages), he’s leaving the show. Luckily, he’s already lined up a new one with NBC.
–Judy Greer is taking another crack at TV stardom.
-Speaking of TV stardom, Sharon Stone is making the jump to the small screen.
–David Beckham is shirtless in this preview from H&M‘s upcoming 2014 Super Bowl commercial. You’re welcome.
-The bromance continues: Zach Braff crashed Donald Faison‘s Reddit AMA.
-The guy Matt Damon played in Behind the Candelabra has just been sentenced to 8-20 years in prison.
–This song from The Lego Movie by Tegan & Sara and The Lonely Island will be in your head for the next 18 months. Get ready.
-Here’s a great visualization of how very wrong Jenny McCarthy is about vaccines.
-Someone recut the Her trailer with Philip Seymour Hoffman as Samantha, and it’s kind of hilarious.
–Jay Leno complains about how he was “blindsided” when NBC dumped him in this week’s 60 Minutes. Now he knows how Conan feels.
-A new Walking Dead preview has landed. Poor Darryl got stuck with Beth, who’s the WORST.
–Scarlett Johansson can’t stop talking about her SodaStream. I have a friend who has one and I must admit, they are a game changer.
-Here’s the first trailer for Better Living Through Chemistry. I love and adore Sam Rockwell and Drinking Buddies has given me a new appreciation for Olivia Wilde, so I’m in.