Monthly Archives

June 2015

Madonna’s Latest Video Fail

madonna-bitch-im-madonna

-My, how the mighty have fallen. Madonna‘s “Bitch, I’m Madonna” video was supposed to drop yesterday but was delayed (the second time that’s happened to her this year). Then it debuted on Tidal for subscribers only — though it keeps getting uploaded and pulled on YT. And when I finally found a version online, it turned out to be super underwhelming. Despite promising cameos by Beyonce, Katy Perry, Nicki Minaj, Miley Cyrus and more, none of them actually interact with Madonna. Nicki, for instance, couldn’t be bothered to show up and basically FaceTimes into it. How did this happen?

-When Miley wasn’t barely appearing in Madonna’s video, she was busy launching an Instagram series called #InstaPride to celebrate transgender people. Man, I’m really starting to like this kid.

-According to Us Weekly, Charlize Theron and Sean Penn are dunzo.

–Emma Stone talks about panic attacks, the Sony hack and maintaining her privacy in this charming new interview. (I love that as a kid she was a computer geek who knew HTML.) She also admits that she passed on the all-female Ghostbusters remake because she didn’t want to commit to another franchise.

–Mindy Kaling tried out a sexual abuse joke on GMA this morning and it went over about as well as could be expected.

-Meanwhile, her movie Inside Out is currently sitting at 100% fresh on Rotten Tomatoes with 61 reviews counted.

–James Corden mocked Donald Trump’s presidential announcement with a new game show called “Trump Stumpers” and it was hilarious.

-Also, Corden helped Arnold Schwarzenegger act out all of his movies in just six minutes.

-Meanwhile, the best part about this oral history of Batman Forever is when a producer lets it slip that Arnold pays $1 a year to “borrow” the Mr. Freeze costume. lolololol

-Words I never wanted to say/think/type: The Walking Dead’s Norman Reedus and Emily Kinney are rumoured to be dating. He’s 46 and she’s 29 (which is way older than I thought she was, but still). Luckily, it may just be wishful thinking by fans/Us Weekly: Norman’s rep has denied the report.

–Aaron Paul is going to be in a Hulu show created by Jason Katims?! YOU GET ME, HULU.

-Great Buzzfeed article on the latest tabloid taboo: When a celebrity is in an observable same-sex relationship, and how the media is obsessed with self-declaration.

-There’s a lot of talk about  Jennifer Lawrence‘s $20 million payday, so Vulture has a detailed explanation about why she deserves every damn penny.

-Brace yourselves: the Internet is going to ruin Game of Thrones‘ next season long before it premieres. (Just in case the actor in question’s complete lack of IMDB activity for the next year hasn’t already tipped you off…)

-This article on HBO includes a line about how the network is wooing ex ESPNer Bill Simmons. Also, The Wire creator David Simon is working on a porn show set in the 70s for HBO.

-In his Reddit AMA, Channing Tatum mocks Jupiter Ascending, talks about his love of Chili’s and getting lost in Matt Bomer‘s eyes, and is an all-around charm bomb.

–Stephen Amell is using his huge Facebook following to get Blue Jays’ third basemen Josh Donaldson voted into the MLB All-Star Game. And he called out this article about it for having “possibly the worst headline ever.” (I dunno, it got me to click on an article about BASEBALL, so I kinda think it’s a winner…)

-@smartbitches is reading the new 50 Shades book and live-tweeting it, and it’s glorious!

-The early reviews for True Detective season 2 aren’t exactly glowing, but at least Taylor Kitsch looks great in the new issue of Elle.

-Does this Nic Cage movie actually look good, or am I just drunk(er than usual)?

Anna Kendrick confirms Pitch Perfect 3

Happening #3

A post shared by Anna Kendrick (@annakendrick47) on

-Universal has confirmed that Pitch Perfect 3 will hit theaters on July 21, 2017 and star Anna Kendrick and Rebel Wilson. Make that cash, ladies!

-I’m so freaked out by Kate Hudson’s rib cage right now…

-Lifetime’s unauthorized behind-the-scenes movies are uniformly terrible, but their next one will be about Beverly Hills, 90210 so we might have to drunk-watch this thing.

-Harsh headline, EW: “Did Grey’s Anatomy Just Replace Patrick Dempsey?” Not untrue, but harsh.

–Tilda Swinton opened a school and it sounds like the happiest place on Earth. No grades, no tests, all Tilda!

–Kristen Bell threw a dress up Game of Thrones finale viewing party, and she invited Major from iZombie? I want to go to there.

-Also, Game of Thrones, which showed a child being burned alive and marched a main female character naked through the streets while people threw poop at her, thought a character’s decapitation in the finale would’ve been “gratuitous”. Sure.

-In other depressing TV news: very, very few Orange Is the New Black episodes have been directed by women. Like, dude from Blaine from Pretty in Pink directed more of the series than Jodie Foster.

-Oh yeah, Mark Walhberg has totally reformed, guys.

-That moment when you’re singing an Ed Sheeran song at the mall and he joins in…

–Kristen Stewart’s mom says she never told The Mirror that Kristen Stewart is dating a woman, and now the reporter says she’s going to release the audio recording.

–Aziz Ansari was on GMA this morning and made me super hyped for his Modern Romance book.

-People were so angry at Aaron Paul last night. How is that even possible? That’s like being angry at ice cream.

–Chris Pratt‘s hot streak continues. He just signed on to a movie with Jennifer Lawrence. (Also, I love that JLaw can pull in $20M + 30% backend at this point…)

-Meanwhile, Chris handled this dinosaur prank so well. I would have throat-punched everyone.

-Excellent read from Grantland on how Jurassic World’s immense win of the weekend is not entirely free of collateral damage.

-Speaking of excellent reads, here’s the Washington Post’s glowing take on UnREAL.

-Starz has greenlit and adaptation of Neil Gaiman’s American Gods with Bryan Fuller and Michael Green as show runners. I’m scared/excited/mostly scared.

–Helen Mirren calls Hollywood ageism “f-cking outrageous” in this new video.

–Richard Gere made me tear up a little in this trailer for Time Out of Mind.

Dear Game of Thrones: No One Believes You

Theon (Alfie Allen) and Sansa (Sophie Turner) in the Season 5 finale of Game of Thrones
Theon (Alfie Allen) and Sansa (Sophie Turner) in the Season 5 finale of Game of Thrones. (HBO)

–Twitter exploded after last night’s Game of Thrones finale (though pretty much everyone is convinced that the shocking end moment isn’t going to stick — despite what the actor and producers are trying to sell us).

-Also, can we talk about the awesomeness of Brienne? Last night, her 30 seconds of screen time almost made up for a season that seemed to really hate women more than usual. (And seriously, turning what happened to Sansa into a redemption arc for Theon? COME ON!)

-My buddy interviewed Lena Headey on her big scene last night. (Which I’m still conflicted about. Also, I’m also not here for a Cersei redemption story.)

-Speaking of shows that only did 10 episodes this season, Vulture has an interesting TV article on how 10 is the new 13 (and 13 was the new 22). I don’t like it. 22 is ridiculous, but the fact that Orphan Black is ending this weekend after it *just* started to get good makes me think 10 episodes isn’t enough to get really into a season.

-Meanwhile, I feel like we should be sick of Michiel Huisman by now because he’s on pretty much every other TV show in existence, but then he goes and says something like this and it’s impossible to turn on him.

-Congrats to Benedict Cumberbatch and Sophie Hunter on the birth of their first child.

–Taylor Swift introduced her cat Olivia Benson to the actress who plays Olivia Benson, and somehow the universe didn’t swallow itself whole.

–John Stamos tweeted that he was “home and well” after being arrested for DUI.

–Kristen Stewart’s mother confirmed that the actress is indeed dating another woman, which hopefully means the phrase “gal pal” will be banished from all future reporting of their relationship.

-This account of  Marlon Brando‘s secret celebrity acting seminar is so bonkers and good.

-I’ve only gotten through a couple of episodes of the new season of Orange Is The New Black, but seriously — what’s with the horrible green screen?

-The Masters of Sex season three trailer is here and I’m already in love with Josh Charles. More so than usual.

–Helen Mirren helped John Oliver debunk 24-style torture last night like the boss that she is.

–Amy Schumer left a 1000% tip at a Long Island restaurant because she is perfection wrapped in dreams.

–Kim Kardashian was a guest on NPR’s Wait Wait, Don’t Tell Me (I know, right??) and she swore she wouldn’t be naming her new baby South West.

–Lena Dunham was the latest star to compete in a lip sync battle with Jimmy Fallon. It might have been the most uncomfortable one yet.

–Mark Ruffalo stopped by the Daily Show to gently remind Jon Stewart about all the times he didn’t do any research before his interviews.

-Another week, another round of paparazzi shots of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner at the farmer’s market. Fresh produce is super important, guys!

-It’s great that Jurassic World officially took down The Avengers to become the biggest domestic opening of all time with $209M, but I’m giving a hard side-eye to this article that claims Bryce Dallas Howard tottering around in high heels is some sort of feminist victory.

–Winona Ryder is going to headline Netflix’s next supernatural drama, which is such a good career move for her. WINO FOREVER!

–Emma Roberts and Evan Peters have called off their engagement. Hey, remember when she was taken into custody in Montreal a couple of years ago because the police responded to a call and found those two beating on each other? She’d probably prefer if we didn’t.

-According to Matt Bomer, the Magic Mike XXL cast “have no boundaries left.” Um, I’m going to need some photographic proof of this, Matt.

-Canadian viewers can now watch the first four episodes of UnReal online. It’s my favourite new show.

-Here’s the red band trailer for Dope, which got raves at Sundance. (NSFW, obvs.) I was sold on the Coachella joke.