–Olivia Wilde and Jason Sudeikis welcomed a son named Otis, who we can only presume is the funniest, most attractive baby in history.
-Don’t you dare insult George Clooney‘s friends! He will deliver a verbal smackdown and then he’ll follow it up with official statements confirming his verbal smackdown skillz!
–Rihanna and Drake are reportedly getting serious. My heart just pooped its pants.
-I think Jezebel’s click-baity headline about Tori Spelling faking her marriage troubles for TV isn’t really backed up by the article, but it does bring up some eyebrow-raising points about the timing. Their camp’s response isn’t exactly definitive, either.
-Did Katy Perry hook up with Jared Leto at Coachella? But I thought she hooked up with Diplo at Coachella? I can’t keep up with Katy’s vagina.
-Also, Katy’s new video debuted today. Eesh!
-Does it bum anyone else out to learn that Lupita Nyong’o is in talks to join Disney’s Jungle Book, especially the day after the People cover? Maybe it’s just ’cause I recently rewatched that Chris Rock bit at the Oscars about how black people can only play animals in animated films…
-An L.A. judge is refusing to release Chris Brown back out into the world, making him by new hero.
-This review of The Other Woman made me laugh out loud. (“It seems like a dreadful missed opportunity that they didn’t call this ‘Right, Fellas?: The Movie.’ Someone in marketing was not keeping his [probably his] eye on the ball.”) Also, a movie with three female leads doesn’t pass the Bechdel test? Ugh.
-I hate Taylor Swift’s shorts here, though I do applaud her sudden and total transformation into a New York hipster.
-I really want to see this documentary on TV showrunners, which follows Joss Whedon, JJ Abrams, Jane Espenson, Ronald D. Moore, Kurt Sutter and more.
–Anthony Bourdain did a Parts Unknown episode on Vegas (just in time for my visit next weekend!). His riff against EDM is pure gold. “Are we just old, or are we non-douchey?”
-Is there anyone in the Pretty Little Liars cast that James Franco hasn’t been in bed with?!
–This spoof script for the now-infamous Game of Thrones scene is perfect. It mocks both the scene and the controversy surrounding it.
-Brooklyn Nine-Nine’s Joe Lo Truglio married his girlfriend in front of the most awesome collection of wedding guests ever.
–Beyonce topped Time’s 100 Most Influential People list and celebrated with a new video.
-Look how happy new dad Idris Elba looks! Adorabs.
–Avril’s response to the totally valid criticism that her new video is racist? “LOLOLOL!!!” Seriously, someone needs to do an intervention with this woman and remind her that she’s no longer 15.
–Lake Bell announced her pregnancy by showing up to an event in an awesome maternity jumpsuit.
-I’ve heard nothing but amazing things for the UK show My Mad Fat Diary, but American remakes are usually never a good idea. You can watch the original here.
-Speaking of American remakes, here’s the first photos for Fox’s Broadchurch adaptation Gracepoint. I want to be skeptical of this because the original was so good, but the stills look moody and right.
-In other news concerning rain-drenched TV shows, Netflix just announced that the final season of The Killing will debut on August 1. That show totally won me over last season (and then lost me again in the season finale). Still, that prison scene with Peter Sarsgaard might have been the best thing on TV last year.
–Lily Allen is calling out Beyonce, Katy Perry, Rihanna, Lady Gaga, and Lorde in her new video because she’s kind of the worst.
-This is nuts: The woman who created the Vampire Diaries books, L.J. Smith, was fired from the series a few years ago and is now completing her version of the books through fan fiction.
-Yes to this article about the latest Parks and Recreation plot development. I spent a lot of the last episode praying it was all a dream sequence.
-Here’s the new Sin City: A Dame to Kill For trailer. Grantland called it “bro-steppy,” which is perfect.
–Cameron Diaz and Jimmy Fallon created a game called “roller golf” and it was pretty amazing.
