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David Bowie

Justin Bieber Makes Bodyguards’ Life Hell

Justin Bieber is getting mocked for having his bodyguards carry him up the Great Wall of China — and then posing for a photo with said bodyguards while pretending to be exhausted from the climb. His bodyguards also had to sprint behind him while he skateboarded, so they’re clearly loving life right now.

-God bless HuffPo for pulling together “A Definitive Guide To All The Times Jennifer Aniston Has Supposedly Been Pregnant.

-Move over, VMAs. YouTube is hosting its first music awards show, and they snagged Lady Gaga, Arcade Fire, and Eminem.

-Meanwhile, you can now watch Arcade Fire‘s weird concert special on YouTube. Celeb cameos galore!

David Bowie is way better at reading than you.

-In terms of how to handle the paparazzi, I think that Rihanna is at the top of the celebrity heap (mostly because she’s become her own paparazzi, sharing so much, so publicly and so often that it drives down agency demand). But because of that, it’s hard to hear her bitch about wanting privacy.

Amy Poehler looks amazing on the cover of Variety, where she talks about her charity work with Worldwide Orphans Foundation.

-Speaking of Amy Poehler, here’s the first look at her taking on Kristen Bell on Parks and Rec.

-This is a long (but still fascinating) firsthand account of being in Justin Timberlake‘s orbit for a few hours.

-EW imagines every Breaking Bad character’s life 10 years from now.

-Breaking Bad’s Bob Odenkirk has a new sketch show on IFC, and you can watch a full episode here.

Stephen Colbert kidnapped Vince Gilligan and tried to force him to write more Breaking Bad.

-Speaking of BB, this dance track featuring Aaron Paul is just so “ugh.” But it’s way better if you listen to it while staring at this GIF.

Amanda Palmer (who is awesome) responded awesomely when the Daily Mail decided to review her lady parts instead of her festival performance.

-I love and adore Mazzy Star‘s “Fade Into You,” but it might actually be the most overused song in all of TV and film.

Jack Davenport looks pretty hot in the trailer for Breathless, making me forget all about Smash.

-Somehow, voluptuous Kate Upton got the Karl Lagerfeld seal of approval.

Michelle Rodriguez is pretty great in this EW interview, saying, “I don’t talk about what I do with my vagina.”

-I love me some Rob Riggles action, but a spinoff of Modern Family sounds terrible. Have we all forgotten about Baywatch Nights?!

Miley Cyrus, you now it’s bad when even Vanilla Ice feels justified in making fun of you.

-Speaking of Vanilla Ice, New Girl star Max Greenfield impersonated him, which made Arsenio Hall very happy.

Jada Pinkett Smith is opening up about her struggle with “addictions.”

-Jay Z is in this month’s Vanity Fair. Did he have to cross Gwyneth to do it?

Catherine Hardwicke says that even though she helmed the megahit Twilight, it’s still hard to find work as a female director in Hollywood.

-Everything about the gov’t shutdown reminds me of this.

-Meanwhile, Billy Zane is blaming the shutdown on Breaking Bad. Or something.

-The new trailer for The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug has landed. What up, Legolas?

-Speaking of trailers, whenever I talked to people when in line during TIFF, the movie that kept coming up again and again as the best anyone had seen was Philomena. Here’s the trailer, featuring Steve Coogan and Judi Dench.