–James Corden texting Leo DiCaprio from Jennifer Lopez‘s phone about what to do for fun and him responding “You mean tonight, boo-boo? Club wise?” is giving me LIFE!
-Meanwhile, James Corden, Jon Bernthal, and Cuba Gooding Jr. had a breakdance battle. Kinda.
–Charlize Theron insists she didn’t actually “ghost” Sean Penn. I guess I should probably stop working on that statue I’m sculpting in her honour…
–Jennifer Lawrence is suddenly very interested in doing more X-Men movies. Sure she is.
-If you have a minute, this writer’s takedown of Elle magazine and what they did to his interview with elusive fashion legend Rei Kawakubo is a hell of a read. (Frankly, both sides don’t come off well here. But it’s rare to see someone burn down every bridge in such a nutso way.)
-Speaking of nutso, NBC’s next live event is going to be A Few Good Men adaptation from Aaron Sorkin. What?
–Susan Sarandon has finally backtracked on her comments about Trump, thankfully. Dammit Janet!
–Whoopi Goldberg is launching medical marijuana products targeted at menstrual cramps. Marry me.
–Chris Brown mocked Kehlani’s suicide attempt because he continues to be the human equivalent of a male pinky ring.
–Seth Meyers announcing his first baby (and getting all teary about it) is adorable.
-God bless Wentworth Miller for making everyone feel like shit about that internet meme about him that’s going around.
-Words I thought I’d never type: a CW show helped boost the ratings of a CBS show.
–Claire Danes and Jimmy Fallon played a very energetic game of Fast Family Feud.
–Ben Affleck has definitely written a script for his own solo Batman movie. As much as I thought he was the best part of BvS, I’m gonna need at least five years before anyone brings this up again, mm-kay?
-Warner Bros. released a deleted Batman v Superman scene, starring Lex Luthor. It still doesn’t make anything make sense.
–Nick Offerman has very deep shower thoughts.
–Kiefer Sutherland is trying to be a country singer now. Ok, then.
–Brad Pitt reportedly once offered to sire Melissa Etheridge’s child.
-Ok, Gilmore Girls — you don’t have to bring back EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER that’s ever been on the show. At this point, the entire reboot is just going to consist of actors walking past the camera and waving.
-The new Me Before You trailer was designed in a lab to maximize tear duct activation.