-Dammit. Just yesterday I was linking to Paris Jackson‘s makeup tutorials on YouTube, in which she appeared to be a normal, well-adjusted, happy teen. Today she is recovering after an apparent suicide attempt. According to reports, she was rushed to the hospital after leaving a suicide note, cutting her wrists with a cleaver and downing a large amount of Motrin. Jesus. A lawyer for the family says she’s “physically fine and getting appropriate medical attention,” while a peek at her Twitter page shows some pretty dark posts the last few days.
–Miley Cyrus’ Instagram page is basically just filled with shots of her cleavage this week. That’s one way to sell her new single, I guess.
-The trailer for Lifetime’s Anna Nicole Smith biopic is as depressing and soulless as you’d expect it to be.
–This clip from This Is The End is very NSFW — and very hilarious.
-God bless Rashida Jones for trying to make pyjamas acceptable party apparel. I can totally get behind this!
-Tired of being overshadowed by Harper‘s adorableness, Brooklyn Beckham accompanied his mom to the Glamour Women of the Year Awards last night. Nice try, but it just can’t compare to the Kiss Cam action.
-I usually love and support Roseanne‘s wackiness, but she’s way off base with this.
-The Onion’s take on The Internship slayed me. “I would definitely recommend it to someone looking for a laugh-out-loud comedy eight years ago.”
-Some guy is suing famous podcasters like Marc Maron, claiming patent on the term “podcast.” Um, what?
-Whoever is writing Shopper’s Drug Mart’s customer response letters needs to get a screenwriting deal STAT.
-Also, does Amanda have a secret Twitter account for the thoughts that are too crazy to post on her regular one? Having spent a stupid amount of time on her regular feed, I can’t wrap my head around this concept.
–Whitney Houston‘s daughter Bobbi Kristina got kicked out of her apartment — and judging by the nasty note she left, she blames her neighbours.
–Parks & Rec‘s Jim O’Heir was back last night on Jimmy Kimmel Live playing Rob Ford.
-Speaking of Parks & Rec stars, Nick Offerman offered some romantic advice on Conan last night.
–Beyoncé’s new song from the Epic soundtrack dropped today. Listen here.
-Meanwhile, Bey’s reps continue to deny those pregnancy rumours.
–Will Smith talks about his desire to “move away” from blockbusters, which is exactly the sort of thing one says when one’s latest blockbuster tanks.
-Speaking of war dramas, Taylor Kitsch just signed on to Lone Survivor, which is already getting Oscar buzz.
-I’m not sure why we need yet another Liz Taylor/Richard Burton biopic, but Helena Bonham Carter looks amazing!
–Rhys Ifans makes Harrison Ford look like a press-friendly cuddle-bunny with this latest interview.
–Jennifer Love Hewitt is not only pregnant, she’s also engaged.
-Critics aren’t being very kind to Brad Pitt‘s World War Z, which is not surprising for a movie that had it’s entire third act reshot.
-Awww. John Krasinski and Emily Blunt showed up to support Jenna Fischer in her new Off-Broadway production.
-Meanwhile, Emily Blunt promises she’ll sing much better in her upcoming musical than in that karaoke video with Alison Brie that made the rounds recently. (Um, I loved that video! That may have been solely due to the John Krasinski/Jason Segel cheerleading, though.)
–Robert De Niro can’t get away from the mob in the trailer for The Family. Michelle Pfeiffer deserves better than this!