-Meanwhile, Blake and Ryan Reynolds didn’t legally get married until five days after their ceremony, which people are freaking out over for some reason. Blah blah not legally binding blah blah…
-Also, a wedding guest says Blake looked “ravishing.” Which I’m sure is true but even if it isn’t, what else are they supposed to say? That she came down the aisle looking like a bag of wet meat?
–Amanda Bynes‘ people (she still has those? Where have the been the past few weeks?!) are denying reports that she’s heading to rehab, even though she barricaded herself in a dressing room for two hours yesterday.
-I’m not sure what this video of Chris O’Dowd coaching topless women on trampolines has to do with raising awareness for male breast cancer, but at least he’s trying.
–Mariah Carey has denied those reports of a feud with Nicki Minaj, saying “How can we feud in two days? I think a feud takes a little longer.” Notice how she didn’t dismiss the idea that two women working together must inevitably catfight or claim that there would never be any drama between them? It’s only a matter of time, people.
–Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth put those breakup rumours to rest with an “affectionate” dinner.
-What Jennifer Aniston chose to include (and more tellingly, not include) in her new smartwater ad (which was reportedly written by Justin Theroux) would make the basis for a killer master’s thesis on celebrity denial.
-I love the idea of Parker Posey making a spoof video on Emmy speeches. I just wish I loved the results.
–Russell Brand is the latest star to sue a publication over phone hacking.
-Want to get your squirm on? Watch the most uncomfortable moments from Dr. Phil‘s interview with Dina Lohan.
–Lea Michele performs a super sultry version of “Oops, I Did It Again” on an upcoming episode of Glee. It’s actually pretty good, despite what Kate Hudson’s sourpuss might lead you to believe.
–Pretty Little Liars star Lucy Hale and Secret Circle cutie Chris Zylka have broken up — and judging by this quote from him, it wasn’t exactly amicable.
–Bruce Willis is fighting to recoup the money he was promised for doing promotional appearances for Sobieski Vodka. I went to one of those appearances and he pronounced “blueberries” “bllluuurrrrrberries” — which means I think he deserves every cent he can get.
–Kat Von D and Deadmau5 are reportedly dating. Cue the cheesy “Kat + Mouse” headlines.
–Jessica Simpson says she’ll raise her son the way her parents raised her. So lots of inappropriate focus on his boobs?
-The Gossip Girl season 5 bloopers are out. Every time Ed Westwick talks in his British accent, I double-take.