–Vanity Fair‘s takedown of Tom Cruise left me agape, and that was just the teaser! I can’t wait to read the full article about the “church” of Scientology’s attempts to Pygmalion a wife for him (a report that Paul Haggis is backing up). It’s amazing (and awesome) that VF would go after Cruise like this, especially since they’ve been his go-to publication for big reveals (anyone remember Suri‘s first spread?) Cruise, of course, is denying the story.
-Speaking of celebrity stories that left me agape, Seal‘s comment about Heidi Klum “fornicating with the help” was priceless — even if he did try to backtrack the next day.
–Aaron Paul just confirmed that he’s coming to TIFF for the Smashed premiere. Expect a lot of posts featuring blurry photos of the back of his head on this blog next week.
-Meanwhile, here’s some yummy photos of Aaron on the set of A Long Way Down.
-Aaron’s costar, Bryan Cranston, just signed on to play Kenneth’s stepdad on 30 Rock. I love everything about that.
-Meanwhile, Breaking Bad‘s finale ratings were up 47% from last year. J’adore!
-Everyone take a deep breath: those rumours about Ryan Gosling playing Christian in 50 Shades of Grey are just that — rumours.
-Have you seen the celebrity-signed birthday card Beyonce posted online yet? I don’t want to overstate this, but you should probably stop everything you’re doing and check it out RIGHT NOW.
-Meanwhile, just like the rest of us, Beyonce can barely tolerate Kim Kardashian.
-Speaking of Kim, the people in charge of handing out stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame have no intention of ever giving her one.
-Odd but amazing: Jay-Z joined Pearl Jam onstage for a rendition of “99 Problems.”
-Ah balls. It looks like Katy Perry and John Mayer have reunited.
–Russell Crowe had to be rescued by the Coast Guard this weekend. Apparently Simon Cowell was busy.
-This report about Brad Pitt buying Angelina Jolie a shooting range for a wedding present is sketch. It’s also the stuff daydreams are made of.
-Sad: Omarosa talks about Michael Clarke Duncan’s death and their secret engagement.
–Emma Watson looks stunning in the new issue of Glamour.
-Speaking of stunning, Kristen Stewart covers British Vogue. I love the styling, but she looks a bit like a mouth-breather in those photos.
-NPR is streaming the new xx album, which made me indescribably happy today.
–Alec Baldwin was overheard quizzing Ethel Kennedy about her grandson’s relationship with Taylor Swift. That’s not weird at all.
–Kate Hudson says she worked out six hours a day to lose the baby weight. Ugh. Just typing that sentence exhausted me.
–Chad Kroeger’s parents were surprised by his engagement to Avril Lavigne because they’d never even met her. Lucky them.
-Congrats to Elisha Cuthbert, who is engaged to the Leafs’ Dion Phaneuf. Let’s hope she’s already booked Mandonna for the reception.
-Also, congrats to Grey Anatomy star Jesse Williams. He (and his incredible eyes) are officially off the market.
–Shia LaBeouf felt the need to talk about his split from Carey Mulligan for some reason.
–Blake Lively’s back stars in a new Gucci ad.
-You gotta love that Pippa Middleton is the kind of girl who goes up and introduces herself to guys like Chase Crawford.
-I love how supportiveLauren Graham is of her Parenthood boyfriend Jason Ritter.
–Nina Dobrev says she really tried to fight her attraction to Ian Somerhalder. Um, why?
-I’m not going to lie; I kinda forgot about The Vampire Diaries. But this new promo has fully sucked me back in!
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